Dear Lord, Why Me?

Ok so i had a good day today til my phone decided to jump into the fish pond at Auburn University. Me and my cousin Mitchell went to the fish pond to feed the fish some bread. Well we got there and started to throw the bread into the pond. We watched the fish "go at it" when we threw the tiny balls 0f bread into the pond. Well, when we were about to leave, he picked up the bread bag and we heard a huge "PLOP" in the water and we looked at each other like "what was that?!" Then I start to wonder where my phone is...and then it dawns on me that it could have been my phone. So we rush back to the tailgating area and check for my phone, which wasn't there. So we went back to the pond. Let me describe the pond for you, so that you can get a mental image of why i was so hesitant to go searching for my phone in it. The pond has no filteration except evaporation. The water has a turbidity of about a few inches and then the rest of the way down you can only see green. There is alge all over the stone stuff in the pond and there are coy fish in it. Ok, so i decided instead of putting my hand in that i would put my foot in and feel around for it. I finally found and pulled it out and it still kinda worked. I opened it up and the screen was all messed up and the buttons didnt work on it...so it was dead for now.

Great! First my computer crashes and now my phone has died for good. What next, my car?